Wednesday, April 28, 2010

It's not being selfish, it's putting yourself at the top of your list again

I had an interesting chat with one of my clients today. For confidentiality reasons, we won't name names but needless to say, this client is in the health care industry and specializes in helping patients with chronic pain. This office has many employees who tend to put themselves pretty low on their priority list. People whose jobs involve the constant taking care of others forget that they have to take care of themselves as well. Because of this, the employees are starting to have a "no care" attitude about themselves.
As mothers, we tend to fall into this same trap as well. Everyone comes before our needs: our children, our parents, our husband, our job. Everyone is more important than we are. Because of this, we fall further and further down the chart until we are basically non-existent. When we start to feel this unimportant, we don't care about what we look like. So who cares if I dress sloppy, my hair is out of date, or I am not eating right or exercising?
We should. As mothers, we want to teach our children self-respect and taking pride in yourself. But if as mothers we don't take this same pride in ourselves, then what have we really taught our children? We need to be role models by example and not just by words.
Some people may think that mothers who spend some time on themselves by improving their looks, exercising, etc. might be selfish. After all, that extra time she was at the gym or with her friends was extra time she could have devoted to her children, right? I suppose. But another thing I want to teach my kids is to love yourself and love others. How can I teach them how to love without first loving yourself? So that's why I make sure that I carve out time in my crazy, hectic life for me, just me! For me, it's going out for a run or going to the gym. For you, maybe it's scrapbooking or getting together with your girlfriends for dinner. Whatever it is, it's that time where you realize you haven't forgotten about yourself and become a non-existent person. That you do love yourself and love yourself enough to move up to #1 on the priority list!

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